In Chronic Pain, Looking For Help

[rowanman28]

I just wanted to introduce myself, I'm 31, I'm in Australia, and I've had bone grinding pain for half my life.

I just spent the last few hours looking at different ways to buy drugs online nd was very skeptical, and came across this site.

I have a worn disc in my neck, and for some reason they can't work out, my shoulder blade grinds against my back ribs, and it's like having a broken bone that never heals.

I was on the methadone program about five years ago, for about six years, and morphine before that, (illegally), I spent a few years just drinking, or not taking much else, and now I'm getting prescribed panadiene forte, or codiene pills.

Nothing has ever taken the pain away, but some things help more than others, but my doctor won't prescribe me anything good.

I've been to dozens of doctors over the years, and what I've learned is that because I was on the methadone program, I'm on a list which means they're not even allowed to prescribe me anything except codiene or methaone, no matter how much I need it, without special permission from the health department.

I feel like I'm being punished by not being allowed to take pain killers because I took serious pain killers because I was in serious pain, which seems more than a little wrong.

This may sound like I'm insane, but I'm not, it's just the pain is driving me crazy.

I have thoughts of killing people, robbing, stealing, etc, although I've never been a criminal before. I need to get something, but I don't know where to get heroin or anything on the street. I'm losing my mind from the pain. The best I can do is drink, suck nitrous bulbs, and take lots of codiene, but it's not enough.

I could complain forever, it makes me very angry. Anyone got any advice?

[crucibelle]

rowanman28 -- I just want to welcome you to PR and tell you I'm so sorry for what you are having to go through. I wish I could help, but I don't know what in the world to tell you. There are MANY knowledgeable and caring people here on this forum, though... and I'm willing to bet someone can offer you helpful advice. You've come to the right place. Hang in there, hun.

[brienzi]

@rowanman28 welcome to PR ...Sounds like your at the end of your rope..as they say...
And complaining, that doesn't solve anything...
You've found the right place, know that. Check out the rules under the forum header at the top of the page, Try using the Search Tab at the top of the page., Very powerful and helpful tool..and do some research here...U'll be surprised at what you might find.
Lastly, before ordering from any IOP u just find on the net, do your homework here and find some websites, U'll be glad you did..Good luck.

[Dr-Feel-Good]

Welcome to PR rowanman28, this is an invaluable resource that will help you through your journey of pain and discomfort. I'm sorry to hear about your situation, sounds like you are on the edge of a full mental breakdown. The pain you described seems to be quite extreme and needs medical care. Due to your past involvement with morphine, it might be difficult to get any medical professional to put their license on the line to give you a narcotic pain medicine (albeit you obviously need it). Kratom is a wonderful plant that can be ordered online and its active ingredient is said to be 15X more potent than morphine. Extracts are the only way to go, but I must warn you they taste rancid! Also getting a large dose of "chelated magnesium" every day will help with your anxiety issues. Hope you get to feeling better, and welcome!

[wtbeefy]

Yeah, but search for the Kratom thread using the search feature to learn how to use it. Slow is the way to go!

I'm sorry for your pain, which is an all too familiar feeling.

People with desperate pain go to depserate measures. I hope the Kratom helps for now as it is legall for now.

[rowanman28]

Thank you for your help, I'll check it out. I have a feeling I'll be spending a bit of time on this forum.

[GoingBananas]

Yes , there have been night where i have been desperate too and you will find both understanding and encouragement here. I wish the answers were easy but we know thye are not don't we?

[rowanman28]

I did a bit of a search, and kratom is illegal in Ausralia, although I'm sure I could still get it if I tried hard enough. I don't have a lot of money, I deliver pizza and run a social media marketing website. At the moment, I'm on codiene, alcohol, and nitrous, and I have to go to work in a few hours. I'm feeling a little better today, but still desperate for something. I ordered some bulbs through ebay and I saw them on Amazon. I made a Facebook page called buy cream chargers online if you're interested in discussing that there. That's about all I have to say for the moment.

[wtbeefy]

I did a bit of a search, and kratom is illegal in Ausralia, although I'm sure I could still get it if I tried hard enough. I don't have a lot of money, I deliver pizza and run a social media marketing website. At the moment, I'm on codiene, alcohol, and nitrous, and I have to go to work in a few hours. I'm feeling a little better today, but still desperate for something. I ordered some bulbs through ebay and I saw them on Amazon. I made a Facebook page called buy cream chargers online if you're interested in discussing that there. That's about all I have to say for the moment.

God! You aussies never get to have any fun! Good luck to you.

[Rockieroads]

Sorry to hear of your pain and I didn't realize that about methadone, yet I know of friends whose doctors push that, wow, not a good thing having it on a computer data base for all to see. It sucks that today, nothing is private. Recently I was out of state & went to my old MD for some pain pills to hold me over until I got back home and he had this computer thing that showed all my prescriptions and doctors. He seemed to question me and I was a bit surprised and told him the truth that I hadn't seen my new pain doctor since I moved. I was surprised at his attitude like I was shopping out of state but I had all my medical records there for him to review and he just kept relying on his computer thing or whatever that handheld deviice is called. Sure can understand what you must be going through. Most hospitals have a Charity Care dept, I know as I had been on one. They just look at your bank statements for the last 3 months and it was fairly easy for me as I had like nothing so I was given the card. It allowed me to get MRi's, see the hospital doctors which in Charity care you do get some good doctors as they volunteer their time I suppose for a tax write off. They can also give scripts too. I was told my an administrator of this hospital that all hospitals do have this charity dept. When I went to the clinic there, it was filled with foreigners so they found out about it before I knew. But anyway, that is the only thing I can think of that may help you. Apply at your local hospital for the Charity care. I was told about it by my doctor when I needed get an MRI and had no insurance and couldn't afford $1200 for it. I know it is easier said than done, but hang in there. Wish you better days ahead.

[rowanman28]

I am actually grateful for my doctor prescribing me methadone, even though it didn't help all that much, and it kind of screwed me up a bit. Things are different in Australia. For a start, it was four dollars a day, and that meant I got to keep my house, which is now worth a quarter of a million. I'm on a disability pension, which gives me 350 a week, and with my part time work, I do OK. I don't really have that much to complain about, and there are people a lot worse off than me, but that's kind of what bothers me, because I hear about things on the news, like the latest mass killing in America, or the young female ice dealer in Australia who was killed and cut into pieces, over a drug deal, and I just wonder about the hypocritical, dangerous policies of the health system, which seem to cause more problems than they prevent. People are crazier than they've ever been before, and what they're doing is only making things worse.

[sambob]

God! You aussies never get to have any fun! Good luck to you.

He's doing whip its! Whip its are fun...

[crucibelle]

He's doing whip its! Whip its are fun...

Now I'm going to have that "Whip It" song by Devo stuck in my head all day. Thanks a LOT @sambob!

[UGAgal]

Row,an I am sorry for your pain. It stinks when your a severe chronic pain patient and doctors don't really give a crap.

I never knew that being on methadone marked you for life. I mean you took it only because of serious pain so why would they not treat you now with other stuff?

And I have no clue what whip it's is....so I assume I best just not ask either lol

I do hope you find relief soon. I have been in that severe pain and I know just how bad you have thoughts just to try and get some sort of relief even if for 5 minutes

[Allycat]

@Rowanman, I'm so glad you found this site, I am new as well and learning alot. I fully understand the daily chronic pain, it starts to change you as a person, life can look look pretty bleak at times.Please hang in there as best you can, there is hope, don't give up. Welcome!!

[brienzi]

@UGAgal a "whip it" i believe is when one sucks the air out of a whip cream can..It makes yeah feel light headed and dizzy for a few seconds or longer..

[barkingmad]

@UGAgal a "whip it" i believe is when one sucks the air out of a whip cream can..It makes yeah feel light headed and dizzy for a few seconds or longer..

...which there is no medicinal value to. Its recreational. Just sayin.

[brienzi]

Yes @barkingmad i understand that. That's why i just made a statement and didn't say it was recreational or had any medicinal value..Maybe @UGAgal will read this and know that this is something performed by kids, and is something not 2 be fooled around with..for she has kids...

[2pac4ya]

@rowanman28- When it comes to a Doctor having to put his career and all those years of medical school and debts and the constant threat of a malpractice lawsuit, you can't blame a doctor for being hesitant at wanting to prescribe you something with a substantially high risk of dependence.
I am not familiar at all with medical practices in the southern hemisphere but I do know in the U.S it is possible to sign a pain contract with your Doctor, which helps assure them that you won't abuse your drugs or take them in addition to other drugs. Most of the cases I have heard of people signing Pain Contracts required semi-annual and sometimes monthly drug testing. I wish you the best of luck on your road to relief.

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...which there is no medicinal value to. Its recreational. Just sayin.

While used in a full 100% concentration of NO2 it likely doesn't have any medical uses, but used in varying concentrations, normally mixed with oxygen, it is commonly used and often the first choice of medical first responders needing to administer proper pain treatment, because it doesnt react with other pain killers. Essentially, it is like DXM if I had to compare it to anything "recreational drug" category. In smaller doses it is used in a variety of OTC medicines, but increase the dose and it produces substantially different effects.

[barkingmad]

Yes @barkingmad i understand that. That's why i just made a statement and didn't say it was recreational or had any medicinal value..Maybe @UGAgal will read this and know that this is something performed by kids, and is something not 2 be fooled around with..for she has kids...

Yeah my friend, I know, but I just get frustrated when people who complain about health issues yet still use recreational drugs.