First day without valium

[itis]

Well I think Im just about there. Ive taken a yearish long 30-50mg a day dosage down to nada. I was starting to get my tolerance up quite high and thought it would be good to do a month long taper.

Im happy to report that the sky no longer seems to be falling Though facing a currently medically untreatable condition does occupy a good share of the background noise in my head. Im wondering if I should bite the bullet with this and find my peace with this, however long that may take. Or comply with my better living through chemistry beliefs

Valium does provide an ample "mental womb" for lack of a better word, that allows my thoughts to bounce around without any ONE thing constantly abusing my head. Yet, after all the stress's induced by this benzo taper Im not all to happy to just set myself up to do it again in a few months. Though it brings up an age old question:

What is peace of mind worth?

Because for about 2 bucks a day, it seems like a good deal
And I could definetly use some more

[Mlmk]

@itis,
My friend, you know that I am here and I understand somewhat of your future. Please keep in touch. PM me whenever. I don't know the answer. I'm here tho to listen and throw around ideas.

[itis]

@Mlmk I definetly appreciate it I must say my brain seems to be in a bit of overdrive right now.

[bluesbros]

good luck
hope you manage it

[barkingmad]

@Mlmk I definetly appreciate it I must say my brain seems to be in a bit of overdrive right now.

@itis, you can do it, my friend, don't hesitate to reach out!

[itis]

So day three is pretty much in the books now. I think I can feel the last metabolites leaving my system. I can easily say this has been one of the toughest days, or at least on par with any of my taper stages. For the last week I've slept maybe 4 hours a night, once I wake up its hopeless to fall back asleep. But I feel slightly more of a spark inside.

Pain of division is nothing, the joy of dissolution is everything.

[MellowMind]

@itis your courage is refreshing. It must be difficult with how little sleep you are getting. May I ask how bad your withdrawl symptoms are? Besides the insomnia that is. For the insomnia you may want to try some melatonin. I know it may not do much, but it's worth a shot. Also a nice warm shower/bath before you go to sleep. Try and avoid all stimulants, caffeine, nicotine, alcohol, sugars, etc. Lots of fresh fruit and vegetables and fruit juice.
Also, maybe look into taking some sort of vitamin supplement. There are ton's on the market, so make sure you review the company before making a purchase. I've found Vitamin B complex to be very beneficial for my anxiety long term. Also exercising and doing anything you possibly can to make your body physically tired during the day.

I wish you the best of luck my friend! We are all here for you.

[billyboy1965]

What is peace of mind worth?

Maybe you have it and just don't remember. Think hard and hopefully it will come back. Good luck.

[fatalframe]

4 hours of sleep, you lucky bastard. I get that even when I have nothing in my system for weeks but then again I've been fighting insomnia for the most part of my life.. Thats why I constantly look like I've been partying all night . I have never been at peace with myself either so maybe that's at the root of my own insomnia, maybe you should listen to what billy said..Maybe it is hidden somewhere, just like it is hidden somewhere in me (at least that's what I keep telling myself)

[itis]

Oh I know its in there somewhere. shit I used to have plenty. Just lots of things in my life are going to change. So instead of feeling like I can do whatever I want I'm going to be dictated to by certain conditions. It's just gonna take more to find it, while poppen a couple valium sets my head right without any trying. It is what it is. That's what itis. I just want to appreciate the now, not think about the future and see what I can while I can. It's good having some support, I appreciate it guys and girls.

[motherfooker]

Youre going cold turkey buddy?

[itis]

No I've tapered for a month. But yeah this is day 4, no turkey. Although maybe some tryptophan would do me some good right now.

[motherfooker]

dayum junior your balls must be enormous to come down from that dosage like that, major e-props to you holmes, you got a up hill battle up ahhead, stay sane and dont frizzle out.


keep us updated~~~~~~~~~

[itis]

In all honesty I don't think this was as difficult as dropping a two year k-pin spree in my twenties. There is a lot of by products from the v's still kicken around in my system somewhere I'm sure. I have a hunch they'll be a few more hurdles. 25mg sounds very tempting right about now

"If there were no rewards to reap, or loving embrace to see me through, this tedious path I've chosen here, I certainly would have walked away by now....and I still may"

[HeatWin]

What side effects did you experience in going off valium? Why go on valium in first place - why not Xanax?

[itis]

Well side effects have been increased anxiety, sleep and appetite loss, foggy brain feeling among others. I chose valium because it just makes me feel normal. It lasts longer than a few hours. Xanax gives me a definite buzz that I enjoy but that wasent really all I was looking for. Plus, I've heard xanax withdrawal is horrible, worse than kicken dope horrible. Dident really wanna start down that path, though I'm not against the occasional 2 or 3.

[fatalframe]

I still don't quite understand why Xanax withdrawal should be horrible.... It has a much lower half-time (and by my logic that also equals giving your brain less chance to adapt to the drug cause its out of the system faster while active valium metabolites persist for 36-200 hours) and I've never experienced any side effects when the dose wore off and didn't feel any urge to take another one either.. But maybe the whole withdrawal symptomes issue only becomes relevant when you are taking it continously which I haven't been doing. I only take it when I know my shithead supervisor wants to talk to me so I won't give a damn about what she may throw at me

[drlmg]

Try to never stop taking any benzodiazepine all at once. If you see you are about out with no hope of getting more immediately, taper the dose off over a period of a week or so till it is virtually not even a therapeutic dose.. Coming off a BD drug is hell.... all I can say (bad advice but it should work) get some beer, wine, or liquor and when you get to a safe place such as home, drink. Heavy the first night without valium (VERY dangerous to drink with a BD drug, even more dangerous with barbiturates - NEVER do that), taper off over a few days but stop... don't become an alcoholic in the process. This is bad advice but should work. It should at least keep your legs from jerking while trying to fall asleep.

[itis]

Why do I get the feeling your not even a real Dr?

[drlmg]

RE fatalframe.... I have seen people who get psychologically, physically, and physiologically addicted pretty quickly. Most people don't as I assume from your comment would include you, I don't either. It takes at least 6 months to a year of continual usage for me to become addicted. I am very fortunate, hopefully you as well. Many times you can tell by a person's behavior and personality if they are one to become addicted quickly.
With the xanax addiction, I agree with your comments but maybe they took it often throughout the day (unless I missed something). Interestingly (to me at least) I have been addicted to hydrocodone before and despite the relatively short half life, I was OK just to take 5mg once a day. But take that one dose away and I definitely had problems.... all the symptoms of withdrawal. I used tramadol to wean myself off, now I don't take either..... just meth..JOKING!!
It is a little bit (not much though) hard for me to stay completely off everything because if I want something I simply prescribe it for myself or my wife. But lately pharmacies around here are really cracking down on these things.